I am to blame for my own loneliness,
I was afraid to marry and take responsibilities of a family. There was partition of property and all went away, taking their share. I was left behind.
During the firsrt few years, I was happy. I did not like a crowd, even if they are my own people. I had no dificulty in cooking food etc, spending my time reading half a dozen English newspapers and magazines. I hate TV instead, hear the transistor radio, which I carry wherever I go in the old house which is otherwise a ghost house. Occasionally my cousin brother comes. He is married but lives alone, his wife being in the US, withe her son who is studying there. We play chess, a game best suited for spending time. He shares my views on most matters except politics. “you still think marriage is unlikely?” I said:”The other day, a kalan kozhy (the fowl of death in English) cried at midnight and I was terrified, something I cannot, even now, explain why. There is no question of my being superstitious; but fear is unbearable. I have decided to sell this old heritage and buy a flat at Koch.I have advertised it.” He did not comment.That night The kalan kozhy cried again; but I was not afraid. In the presence of some one I am fearless. The very idea of death did not terrify me, in a way, it may be good. is there anything to expect i life? In the evening a phone call came;”Is it —mana?” I said yes. “MY name is Poulose. I stay at Kottayam. I like to see your home.” “You may come any time. There are enough rooms here to accommodate a marriage party. Come to Trichur and then to Arattupuzha. Any one will tell you the way to my house.”
He came in the evening. His wife and a daughter were also with him.
They went round and saw the house and the area around the hose, “The river is an added attraction,” his wife said.
“Oh, papa, do buy it. We can do boating every day”, said the daughter, flashy as a college girl.
“Where are you studying?”, I asked her. “She is a house wife,” said her mother. I called a catering fellow I know. “Non-veg. or veg?”, I asked the madam. “As you please,” she said. I ordered two vegetarian and three non-veg.
“Would you like to take bath in the river?” “We did not bring towel.” I gave them three towels and soap. If you want oil, tell me which oil. We have it.”
It was moonlit night. Myself and my cosine began to swim. The daughter too followed us. WE reached the other bank and rested there. “I am Sankaran and he is Chandan, my cosine. You are?”
“Selina. My husband is in the US, doing business.” “Children?” “None” “Shall we return?” “Wait for some more time. I have not enjoyed such an evening, the Moon too is happy”
The dinner was lively; both the mother and daughter went on talking and eating ravenously.
The next day too I arranged the break fast and they left by eleven. Selina shook hands with me and invited me to come to Kottayam. When they left, Chandran observed that the deal is almost decided. Selina will insist on it. I said that the father did not utter a single word. He is a hard headed business man.
For one full month, we did not hear from him; Selina called me often and asked me why I am not coming there. I told her a lie:”Some people have come and seen my house; what shall I tell them?” “I will tell papa.”
The next day he said:”Come here . We are waiting”
I went alone. We had decided that one crore is the bench mark. After hard bargaining, they offered one and a quarter. I had brought all the papers. We went to a lawyer and signed the agreement. I got fifty thousand and returned home jubilant. Selina came with me. “Papa, I am the owner, Sankaran will be my honored guest.”
We returned in her car, driven by herself. I found her to be a reckless driver, speed going up to 120 KM. Seeing my anxiety, she said:”In America, we may never travel below the maximum speed. I am used to it.”
She brought a TV set and her computer in the car, which reached safely at five in the evening. We went to take bath. After swimming for some time, she said we go home. There I lighted my stove and began preparing supper.
I was afraid to marry and take responsibilities of a family. There was partition of property and all went away, taking their share. I was left behind.
During the firsrt few years, I was happy. I did not like a crowd, even if they are my own people. I had no dificulty in cooking food etc, spending my time reading half a dozen English newspapers and magazines. I hate TV instead, hear the transistor radio, which I carry wherever I go in the old house which is otherwise a ghost house. Occasionally my cousin brother comes. He is married but lives alone, his wife being in the US, withe her son who is studying there. We play chess, a game best suited for spending time. He shares my views on most matters except politics. “you still think marriage is unlikely?” I said:”The other day, a kalan kozhy (the fowl of death in English) cried at midnight and I was terrified, something I cannot, even now, explain why. There is no question of my being superstitious; but fear is unbearable. I have decided to sell this old heritage and buy a flat at Koch.I have advertised it.” He did not comment.That night The kalan kozhy cried again; but I was not afraid. In the presence of some one I am fearless. The very idea of death did not terrify me, in a way, it may be good. is there anything to expect i life? In the evening a phone call came;”Is it —mana?” I said yes. “MY name is Poulose. I stay at Kottayam. I like to see your home.” “You may come any time. There are enough rooms here to accommodate a marriage party. Come to Trichur and then to Arattupuzha. Any one will tell you the way to my house.”
He came in the evening. His wife and a daughter were also with him.
They went round and saw the house and the area around the hose, “The river is an added attraction,” his wife said.
“Oh, papa, do buy it. We can do boating every day”, said the daughter, flashy as a college girl.
“Where are you studying?”, I asked her. “She is a house wife,” said her mother. I called a catering fellow I know. “Non-veg. or veg?”, I asked the madam. “As you please,” she said. I ordered two vegetarian and three non-veg.
“Would you like to take bath in the river?” “We did not bring towel.” I gave them three towels and soap. If you want oil, tell me which oil. We have it.”
It was moonlit night. Myself and my cosine began to swim. The daughter too followed us. WE reached the other bank and rested there. “I am Sankaran and he is Chandan, my cosine. You are?”
“Selina. My husband is in the US, doing business.” “Children?” “None” “Shall we return?” “Wait for some more time. I have not enjoyed such an evening, the Moon too is happy”
The dinner was lively; both the mother and daughter went on talking and eating ravenously.
The next day too I arranged the break fast and they left by eleven. Selina shook hands with me and invited me to come to Kottayam. When they left, Chandran observed that the deal is almost decided. Selina will insist on it. I said that the father did not utter a single word. He is a hard headed business man.
For one full month, we did not hear from him; Selina called me often and asked me why I am not coming there. I told her a lie:”Some people have come and seen my house; what shall I tell them?” “I will tell papa.”
The next day he said:”Come here . We are waiting”
I went alone. We had decided that one crore is the bench mark. After hard bargaining, they offered one and a quarter. I had brought all the papers. We went to a lawyer and signed the agreement. I got fifty thousand and returned home jubilant. Selina came with me. “Papa, I am the owner, Sankaran will be my honored guest.”
We returned in her car, driven by herself. I found her to be a reckless driver, speed going up to 120 KM. Seeing my anxiety, she said:”In America, we may never travel below the maximum speed. I am used to it.”
She brought a TV set and her computer in the car, which reached safely at five in the evening. We went to take bath. After swimming for some time, she said we go home. There I lighted my stove and began preparing supper.
she watched me making sambar and tasted it.Wonderful, she commented. She then set up the TV and watched some English movie showing sex. She called me and told me to watch:”After they come, I will lose my freedom”. She removed my lunki and underwear. and told me to undress her. The sight of her young breasts boiled my blood and we lost no time in starting it. I found her to be very impatient in sex also.
The next day we went to Kochi and bought a fishing boat and net. The night we spent in a hotel and returned the next day. Chandran was there waiting for me. I told him they bought my house for 1.25. HE was glad.As planned, we brought men who pulled down all wood work. Seeing the quantity of timber, Chandran said we should have done this before advertising for sale. They bought the whole for fifty thousand! I congratulated the girl. She smiled and told her father the good news. We had made a plan to demolish the brick work and first build a hall, to be used as drawing room later. Accordingly I gave a contract for this work. When her parents came after two weeks, they were happy to see the progress. “Let Sankaran stay here to supervise the contract work” said her mother.
Where will he go then?; we have bought his house. I shall not send him anywhere. He remains here, until he likes to go”. The house had been transferred in her name, the parents left after a month.
“Do you want to go?”She asked in the night. “I want to go just now into your …”
The next day we went to Kochi and bought a fishing boat and net. The night we spent in a hotel and returned the next day. Chandran was there waiting for me. I told him they bought my house for 1.25. HE was glad.As planned, we brought men who pulled down all wood work. Seeing the quantity of timber, Chandran said we should have done this before advertising for sale. They bought the whole for fifty thousand! I congratulated the girl. She smiled and told her father the good news. We had made a plan to demolish the brick work and first build a hall, to be used as drawing room later. Accordingly I gave a contract for this work. When her parents came after two weeks, they were happy to see the progress. “Let Sankaran stay here to supervise the contract work” said her mother.
Where will he go then?; we have bought his house. I shall not send him anywhere. He remains here, until he likes to go”. The house had been transferred in her name, the parents left after a month.
“Do you want to go?”She asked in the night. “I want to go just now into your …”
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